(Unless you tell it stupid things. Then it bites.)
🧠 PART 1: How to Talk to Python Without Sounding Like a Clown
You’re gonna open a .py file (that’s just a fancy way of saying a Python script). Or use a notebook if you want to feel like a Pinterest-core tech goddess. Doesn’t matter.
Let’s learn how to declare, print, and make choices.
📝 1. VARIABLES — Your Memory Pockets
Python remembers stuff for you.
You tell it: “Hey, this name? Save it. I might use it later.”
name = "ivory"
age = 16
favorite_color = "Gold like my future"
🖨️ 2. PRINT — Loud and Proud
You want to see what’s inside your variable? Say it with your chest.
(Well, Python’s chest. Yours is for contour and confidence.)
print(name)
print("Hi, I'm", name, "and I'm", age, "years old.")
Or, use this modern magic called f-strings (they’re chic):
print(f"Hi, I’m {name}, and I only wear {favorite_color}.")
❓ 3. IF STATEMENTS — Being Picky
You like choices. Python does too.
This is how you make it judge things, like you judging my playlist:
mood = "hungry"
if mood == "happy":
print("Go outside and touch grass.")
elif mood == "hungry":
print("Order sushi. Don't settle for sad snacks.")
else:
print("Nap. Reset. Reboot.")
🔁 4. LOOPS — Repeating Without Losing Your Mind
You want to do something multiple times without copying & pasting code like a rookie?
colors = ["Black", "Beige", "Burnt Orange", "Soft Chaos Pink"]
for color in colors:
print(f"I might wear {color} today.")
🧮 5. Integers vs. Floats — Numbers That Judge You
- Integer = whole number (like your ex’s emotional range: limited)
- Float = decimal number (like your willpower around cupcakes: unstable)
followers = 1200 # int
growth_rate = 3.75 # float
✂️ 6. String Methods — When You Wanna Be Extra With Words
Strings are just text. But Python lets you style them like they’re going to the Met Gala.
quote = "stay soft, but never weak"
print(quote.upper()) # Yelling
print(quote.title()) # Cute like a poem
print(quote.replace("soft", "dangerous")) # Instant drama
🎒 7. Lists — Group Chat Vibes
Lists are how Python keeps multiple items in one cute little purse.
crushes = ["Jules", "Aiden", "Nico"]
print(crushes[1]) # Aiden
crushes.append("Sasha") # adds Sasha to the list
crushes.remove("Nico") # bye, Nico
🔑 8. Dictionaries — Your Secrets and Tea Organizer
Remember: it’s {"key": "value"}
So elegant. So nosy.
you = {
"name": "Sis",
"mood": "determined",
"python_skill": "glowing"
}
print(you["mood"])
🎭 9. Booleans — True or False, Just Like Red Flags
Python has a dramatic side. It only sees True or False.
is_cute = True
is_toxic = False
print(is_cute and not is_toxic) # True. We like that.
🔁 10. While Loops — Repeat Until Sanity is Lost
Careful. This keeps going while a condition is true. You have to stop it. Just like overthinking.
energy = 3
while energy > 0:
print("Still thriving...")
energy -= 1
print("Time for snacks and existential dread.")
🎨 11. Input — Let the User Talk Back
Let Python ask questions and store your answers. Kind of like a Choose Your Own Destiny novel but sassier.
name = input("What's your name? ")
print(f"Hi {name}, welcome to coding chaos.")
🪄 8. len() — When You Want the Vibe Check on Length
Get the length of anything that’s list-ish, string-ish, or just generally drama-filled.
drama = "He said what now?"
print(len(drama)) # counts characters — spaces and all
Also works on lists:
sneaky_links = ["Chad", "Not-Chad", "Definitely Chad Again"]
print(len(sneaky_links)) # 3 — seek help
🧽 9. .strip() — Cleans Up Strings Like a PR Agent
People (and strings) be messy. strip() removes extra spaces from the ends.
Perfect for when someone sends “ hey ” and you know they’re not serious.
text = " I need therapy "
clean = text.strip()
print(clean) # "I need therapy"
💅 10. range() — Queen of Counting (but Make It Python)
Used in loops, range() lets you count without breaking a nail.
for i in range(3):
print("Still that girl.")
This prints 3 times: 0, 1, 2. Because Python starts at 0 like it’s emotionally unavailable.
Wanna start somewhere else?
for i in range(1, 4):
print(i) # 1, 2, 3
Boom. You now have 14 shiny Python tools.
💋 BONUS TRICK — Your First Custom Function
You can make your own command, like a spellbook:
def compliment_me():
print("You’re literally the smartest, cutest coder-in-training alive.")
compliment_me() # Call the function or it won't say squat.
Alright. Do not skip this part. Copy the code. Run it. Break it. Fix it.
If you want to impress me, change the variables to something very you. I want sass. I want glam. I want tech-baddie energy.
Then send me the results.
