Want to be remembered as an icon? The type of person people are drawn to instantly, with genuine curiosity and admiration?
Keep reading, because I’m about to show you how to become someone everyone wants to follow.
When you’re just another face, you might get a brief moment of attention, but it fades fast. Then it’s back to normal life while the spotlight moves on.
But staying at the center of attention? That takes something real—skills, traits you can’t fake. If you don’t have them yet, get ready to put in the work.
With attention spans shrinking by the day, standing out for good is harder than ever.
So, pay attention.
What makes people want to follow anyone?
- They want a role model. They want someone they can look up to as they push through life, someone to show them the ropes, and to lead the way to the destination they believe their life would best or at least very likely, be best headed toward.
- People need a distraction from the miseries of life. We can’t pretend that we’re happy with our lives all the time. Sometimes, life sucks. Things don’t go the way we want them to and certain events set the course of the rest of our lives in way we cannot do anything about. Plus, even if we could, it would now take us that much longer and more effort to steer the cruise back to the right course.
If you want to become someone people naturally admire and consider an icon, you need to satisfy at least one of these requirement in order to hold their interest longer than just fifteen minutes.
How to Instantly Become Someone people want to follow and iconize
To become someone someone people instantly want to follow and iconize, you need to be pleasant to be around.
What do you mean ‘pleasant’?
I mean, you need to be likeable.
A lot of the time, when you hear “be likeable”, you immediately imagine that you’re now being required to change everything about yourself and go about life smiling into the sun, waving at everyone along the street and knowing everyone by name (that last one is gold).
You work so hard to be “likeable” that you ignore your mental health and end up becoming someone everyone now pities. At best.
How to be pleasant.
You should never try to fake this. A pleasant person is not necessarily the kind of person who’s always happy and never gets pissed off or sick or sad. A pleasant person is someone people can relate to.
You are relatable because you are real; your reactions are real, your demeanor is genuine and your personality is predictable.
Yeah, I said it.
- Be predictable.
I know the mere idea of having people learn your habits and patterns enough to accurately predict your next move sends chills all across your skin, but people gravitate to what feels comfortable. Reliable.
If you’re the kind of person who does the thing you’d normally do in a situation, based on your target followers’ opinions/predictions, then they like you.
Especially when the thing you’d do in that situation is what they’d do when faced by the same circumstances.
As long as you’re predictable, people feel less inclined to judge you for your actions.
Being someone people want to talk to, and hand around, you must have something they want.
- Don’t be empty.
You cannot get anyone to like you just by being pleasant. That will get you tolerance. You need to have substance.
The icons you yourself follow have something to offer than keeps you coming back for more; in sports, music, business…name it.
Even the most popular girl at school has something everyone finds valuable, which is why she’s the most popular girl at school.
You have to figure out what it is you can offer as many people as possible, without exhausting yourself. That means, it has to be something you just naturally have.
Be it money, charm, physical attraction, science genius (with this, you may not even want people around because you’re all brain and science isn’t easy for everyone to keep up with anyway) or even the best fashion sense.
This of it as a talent or some natural ability or gift you don’t need much effort to share.
This brings us to the last thing you must have in order to be considered even midly pleasant.
- Be generous.
Beyond making people feel unintimidated by your ‘substance’, you need to be the kind of person who doesn’t gatekeep any of it.
This means using your unique gift for the benefit of others. It doesn’t help to have what others don’t, and just hoard it, dangling it infront of others making them hate you just by getting them to be jealous of you.
Share.
If you’ve a charming personality, charm them. If you come from money, or spend it in ways that benefit others, not just yourself.
It’s really simple.
Buy the lady who comes over to clean your apartment a pretty blouse, or hook her up with a hair salon appointment if she ever mentions wanting to doll up for something.
Let her have that rug you wanted to donate elsewhere if she ever mentioned how lovely she finds it.
Now that you know how to be pleasant, I’m going to reveal the secret to getting you to become someone people want to follow and iconize.
You need to make others feel like you believe they matter.
How to keep your ego in check.
- Don’t be trying to one-up whoever’s the star of the moment.
Resist the urge to outdo people’s ‘big thing’. Let them have their moment. You have to be willing and able to celebrate others’ wins even if you think you could do better.
Even if they know you could probably do better.
When it’s your win, you can make it all about you; no one would hold it against you. But to instantly become someone people want to follow and iconize, don’t ever try to grab onto someone else’s glory.
It instantly makes you come off as a loser and a desperate one.
Be more than a listener—be engaged. When someone’s telling you about some office shenanegan that went down, listen keenly.
The intention is to find out how they feel or felt about it, and then to mirror that feeling exactly how they feel it. It it upset them, be upset with them. If whatever happened excited them, be just as excited about it as they are.
Ask stuff that keeps them talking. Be all in.
- No one is that special.
No matter who you’re talking to, don’t act like a starstruck fan. Treat everyone like an equal, no matter how much success they’ve had.
As long as you’re not trying to one-up anyone, you’re not worshipping anyone either. There’s a thin line between appreciating someone and bowing to their greatness.
You may think you checked your ego at the door by letting someone have their moment but the second you start kissing tushies, you’re belittling yourself and injuring your ego in the process.
Be confident in your own value without needing to prove yourself through fawning or hero worship. It’s called self-respect. If you’re overly impressed or deferential, it sends a message that you see yourself as less important.
How to be Mysterious
The most unintriguing thing you can do is forget to keep some things to yourself.
I know I said you have to be predictable, but do not misunderstand that to mean you have to be anything other than relatably human.
For you to be someone people want to follow and even iconize, learn the subtle art of being mysterious.
And it’s easy.
- Let others talk.
To be well liked, you have to be a wonderful listener. And you cannot listen if you’re talking, much less about yourself. When you’re in the company of others, instead of fighting for a chance to get a word in, listen actively and be fully engaged.
This way, you become not just memorable, but a mystery. You learn things about others, relate to their version of events from a truly honest personal perspective, without revealing any more about yourself than is within the scope of the conversation.
Did you know that as long as there can exist multiple interpretations of different versions of an event, you can honestly agree without agreeing and remain likeable without revealing exactly where you stand on things?
Plus, if someone goes around spreading rumors about you, let them. Do not correct them or try to save face. Do not engage or comment. Simply let them talk. It allows you to become a question mark in people’s minds as long as you don’t try to defend yourself.
The truth is, no matter how predictable you are, as human, no one’s holding a knife to your throat insisting that you conform to expectations in those singular instances when any decision you make could be dangerous or perceived as preposterous by different factions. Your mother will want you do make a decision that your man may find tragic and possibly even crazy. Your highschool friends may be okay with you ditching class but your teacher will be unimpressed if you do. Sometimes, the decision you make will be unpleasant to others, though humanly understandable from different points of view by different parties who see your situation from their own unique set of glasses.
